“How come you basically only do women on the Stuff page?”
I’m in the kitchen and it’s my husband asking.
“I don’t know,” I said.
He said, “Don’t you like men or something?”
I said, “In my experience men have been both the best and worst of things.”
He said, “Well, I hope I fit into the former category.”
I went over to him and call him my big, beautiful baby.
I said, “What’s wrong with you today?”
He said, “I am a bit sad. It’s the fortieth anniversary of Elvis Presley’s death today.”
“What? And you want to put him on the Stuff page and you don’t think I will because we basically only do women?”
“And what do you want to say?”
“I want to say to Elvis, that he’s the best and that forty years later there are still people who are sad to think he is not in this world. I want him to know that our memories are strong and we will hold on to him until we join him in the afterlife, wherever that may be.”
“And you think that Elvis reads the Stuff page in heaven?”
“Everyone reads the Stuff page in heaven!”
“And what photo will we use?” I said.
“December the 5th 1970! George Klein’s wedding, with Priscilla. They never looked better!”
“Okay,” I said, ”For you.”
Elvis ushers Glen Campbell into heaven.